Doings & Folks

Stuart runs his own piping business. He’s the uncle of some smurf named Ben, and he lives in Maine. He manages a lot of loud blue-collar locals. They’re all out of shape and hairy. He has great clients. People see him as a prominent business owner, and as a highly respectable, professional member of the community. This is true in his head, on paper, and through his work. More noteworthy, is how Stuart operates all three levels of management: The New Business Department operates out of his truck, specifically via Bluetooth. Payroll and Billing are located in his closet. The largest department, Project Development takes place on his family dining table.

Stuart works harder than anyone in the United States. Everyone in town knows it. He sleeps 5 hours a night. His snoring shakes the walls; Twice the computer fell of the desk. Once the bathroom window cracked. His wife had surgery on her Eustachian tube. His feet stink. He wears white underwear. In his twenties he drove old trucks, played some rugby, grew a beard, ran a few marathons, and climbed some mountains. A little older in his thirties he fished. He dove for abalone. Hunted rooster, wild bores, and elk (is rooster plural?). He played pinnacle, biked some cliffs, attended some NASCAR, read about sailing. He later bought a sailboat. Bought a fishing boat. Bought a surf board and some skiis. Bought some kitchenware off an infomercial. Bought a green truck from the 50s, some tools, and a shop.

Now when Stuart isn’t working, he’s working. He also treats himself to foreign films or PPV, cooks rice pilaf, reads about Republicans, shops for big tools, cleans his shed, drinks red wine, and walks barefoot. Sometimes he golfs. Soon he’ll retire. He won’t have much saved, rather a lot of debt. But he will have the same wife, the same 4 kids, and the same appetite for the outdoors and good wine.

(excerpts from Vowel)


About Angela Gleason

visual designer | writer | pianist in the basement | painter in the night | fashion critic | lush | Italian savant check me out:

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